Clear Day
The sun came out from behind the clouds yesterday and that was a big improvement to the day, to the week, and to my psyche. I’m not a huge fan of the early months of the year. They’re just too dark, short, and cold. When I still worked, I can remember entire days without sun. I’d go to the office in the dark and come home after dark. Depressing. Which I suppose is why in my retirement I try to clutter up the early months with things to do and places to go. I’m chasing away the blues.
And the need to chase those blues became even more pronounced with my wife’s death in 2020. There’s nothing quite like sitting alone in a dark cold house, when you spent the better part of fifty years in the company of someone. And I’m saying this as a man who always treasured his alone time and needed it to recharge his batteries. It’s just that when you get used to something, in this case the company of another, change can be hard. To this day, as I sit on the couch some evenings, I half expect my late spouse to come sauntering out of the bedroom to sit in her favorite chair. I suppose it’s the psychic equivalent of losing a limb. Fathom pain.
Anyway, the sun is up again this morning with no clouds and there’s a nice frost on the ground and I’ll take clear and cold over gray and cold any day. I can smell my neighbor’s wood stove burning and that’s a nice scent for a cold morning. And the day seems off to a fine start. And I think perhaps a long walk is in the offing, which is something one can do on their own, and should do. A modest cure for the blues of any shade.