On Course
Cue James Brown. I feel good. Two weeks into a six-week group grief counseling session, things are falling into place. Of course, it’s a big puzzle with lots of pieces, but I’m encouraged. I think the best thing about it is the tools I’m getting to explore and manage my grief. I’ve always been a sucker for having someone tell me what to do in complex situations, and if your wife dying and trying to deal with the aftermath isn’t complex, then pardon me.
I had an individual counselor at the beginning of the experience, but he thought I’d do better in a group. I signed up for one online, but I found it less than satisfying. So, I set out on my own, trying to power my way through by force of intellect. It’s humbling to discover your intellect may not be up to it. I was beginning to feel as though someone had dropped me off in a far borough of New York and told me be sure and see the Statue of Liberty without giving me directions, a map, or me knowing anything about the statue and what I was looking for. I was adrift, lost.
Now, I know I’m on a quest, but it seems fair if help is offered, help can be taken. Besides, while I might think I know what I’m looking for, I may be wildly off course, and misunderstand the target completely. Which is where the guide comes into play, although, this could be a Siren’s song and I’ll end up wrecked on the rocks or drown in a whirlpool. It’s hard to see that coming into play, however, because as I said at the beginning, I feel good, and I’m going with that.
John W. Wilson is the author of The Long Goodbye: A Caregiver’s Tale