Happy Thoughts
Last night as I was planning today’s words, I wanted to talk about happiness. Then I got a good night’s sleep and now I’m unsure if that’s still a path I’d like to take, partly because it feels as though it’s a platitude fest waiting to happen. I’d really like to say something original, and my mind is having trouble this morning in that regard. I suppose I knew last night before I went to sleep this is what would happen, because I’ve tried to understand happiness for a long time.
I’ve thought about it ever since a counselor told me it wasn’t my job to make someone else happy, I was only responsible for me. That got me thinking about what makes me happy, which eventually left me wondering, what is happiness and why is it just about me. Because I do like to make other people happy by doing things for them, giving a gift, listening to a story, just being together, and that feels like something good. I guess the trick is not to be held hostage, sublimating my desires to satisfy another. Easier said than done, partly because wanting a relationship, romantic or friendly or familial, is a powerful desire and we’ll sacrifice a lot to have it or keep it.
I guess in that sense, it’s important I understand what makes me happy. Then figure out why me being happy might be appealing to someone else. And finally, to know it’s okay to let someone be unhappy because it’s pretty much their choice. And just having that little set of understandings goes a long way toward feeding my happiness. I can work on me, think about others, and know in the end, I’ve done my best. And that makes me happy.