How Happy Feels
Here we are. Another day another dollar. Can’t tell whether the latter is coming or going. Probably going. That pretty much defines retirement and fixed incomes. The dollars mostly go. First world problem though. I still have some, dollars, and I live in a nice house, that’s paid off. I’d say that was a blessing. And I can think of two or three others. For instance, later today, I’ll hook up with my brother and we’ll go play golf with a buddy from high school and his wife.
Yesterday, I got a large part of the garden beneath the big oaks cleaned out and fixed a nice dinner for me and my son. I like gardening and I’m getting better at cooking, although it’s hardly my strong suit. I eat mostly for survival. I’m an overly cautious food experimenter. It’s also why I only frequent one or two restaurants. That and the dollar thing. Its expensive having people cook your food, unless you know people who cook and invite you over for dinner. I do. Another blessing.
Anyway, the week is off to a fine start and promises more. Midweek, I’ll meet up with friends and play a little music, with a dinner date thrown in there for good measure. And the weather is supposed to warm up, and my flowers are blooming. Overall, the life re-building process feels as though it’s moving along. The longing for what I’ve left behind is still pretty intense at times, but, having had my heart broken before, I know it’s possible to get past it. After all, how I feel is totally within my purview and it’s taken me a lifetime to learn that feeling sorry for yourself is pointless. I pretty much like being happy, and I know that a little sadness is how I remember how good happy can feel.
John W. Wilson is the author of The Long Goodbye: A Caregiver’s Tale